Gw mau ambil mat, ketinggalan di mobil. Bebeb parkirnya paralel, mepet sama mobil depannya. Pintu mobil persis di gap antara 2 mobil. Once I’m done, ada mbak2 yang somehow pilih keluar lewat the exact same gap padahal ada kaya, 3 other ways. So yauda saya yang mundur muter ke jalan lain. For a second there, I felt “kalah”.
Which was absurd?
I am going to yoga, right now during office hours. I have no job; yet I am earning a decent amount of WiFi money. I have the best husband; and I have the privilege to call the most wonderful kid mine. I am healthy and I have the freedom and means to do whatever I want. I am so fucking blessed, MashaAllah Tabarakallah.
This feeling popped outta nowhere, but I’m glad I caught it! That’s what meditation is for. Feelings are fleeting; they’re temporary. It’s the mental story we tell ourselves about why we feel a certain way that stays. These emotional storytelling can be conscious or unconscious. They significantly influence how we experience and react to our emotions, how we’ll remember the moment in the future.
I could just stand there on a face-off demanding her to turn around. But what good does it do? It will certainly arouse resentment to both of us. I’m glad I turned around and let her passed. If nothing else, it was just me practicing core Islamic teaching: ease another person's business so that Allah will ease us in our time of need.
Sooooo make sure whatever narrative we attach to our feeling is a good one!!!!
Have a great day, folks 💕